I'm not sure I can relate this story so it's nearly as funny as I think it is... but of course I will try. Yesterday I went to lunch with 2 female coworkers - one of which is wonderfully well endowed. This female - which I will refer to as Busty LaRue - was wearing a low-cut shirt, and I was doing my level best not to look at her chest. Which, considering I am such a breast man there are bras named after me, was a herculean feat.
Today, I was talking to the other coworker about Busty, and I remarked that it was difficult for me to not stare. She said, and I quote: 'I know, I just gave up and stared. They are scrumptious." I literally fell over with laughter and laid down in the hallway, where other a third coworker was concerned that I was having a heart attack.
Scrumptious, indeed!
Dys
1 comments:
Dear Dys/Crit/Whatever,
dude, i didn't know you had moved! cool beans.
okay on cleavage, it's just so hard not to look when it's just so overly obvious... and i'm guessing it's hard not to if you're a breast guy. personally i find that refreshing, only becauese i don't understand how guys are ass men, but then again i'm not a guy and i have no interest in the ass unless it's clinical and i need to do a rectal exam (ew) to rule out bleeding or something. as far as guys are concerned i'm a hair and eyes and face person. then again, a nice body doesn't hurt... mmm.. slabs of meat... mmm... objectification.
okay watches? dude, i didn't even realize tag heuer was an expensive watch. and i watch style network, so i guess that's sad i didn't know that. but um if she only likes you for your wrist-candy, that's sad. i knew movados were cool because someone i know gave it to her fiance as an engagement gift and they are kind of omnious and funky with that one diamond and a plain face. i'd like a movado, but it'd drive me crazy to have no numbers there. and omega... don't know too much about it.
however, dude, movados and tags are like $1000 for a good one. a $400 one, pssshhhhh, why bother? this is what i'm sayin' -- if you're getting it to impress a lady, that's lame. that's super lame. she shouldn't be impressed by your flashy stuff, in fact i think i'd be turned off by a guy who's a little too pretty and a little too in to expensive stuff because it looks pretentious. however, the thrifty thrifts aren't so cool either. be yourself.
don't bling (ahem *whore*) yourself out for a woman's approval. hehe j/k w/ the whore comment. treat her well, and don't be a pussy. that's all we ask for. and would it hurt you all to clean up once in a while? seriously!
you could always do what a friend of mine did, he was rockin' a $25 rolly knockoff. i couldn't tell the difference and i was impressed, and he told me, and i was even more impressed that he didn't drop the change on something so frivilous and easily losable.
if you want to show you've got taste, chances are, a watch isn't really going to mean much if you're dressed like ass. and why try to perpetutate this negativity of showing off a status-symbol? be you. be real. symbols are for the stock market and the hood of a car (okay well those are ornaments but you get my drift...)
but as long as you're going shopping... i could use a movado too.
haha just kidding!!! i'm perfectly content with my $12 target watch or my even better $5 walmart watch which i don't care if it gets damaged in the hospital.
love your ever helpful neighborhood fashionista,
Fashiongrrl :)
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